I Gained Weight And My Husband Started Touching Me Less What Will Happen If I Make Him End His Affair? Here’s Some Possibilities

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What Will Happen If I Make Him End His Affair? Here’s Some Possibilities

I often hear from people who are considering forcing their husband to end his or her affair. They often feel that they have no real choice about this, but they wonder what the consequences could be as a result of forcing their husband. I heard from a woman who said, “my husband has been having an affair for eight weeks. He works with this woman. When I found out and confronted him, he said he wasn’t sure if he was ready for it to break up. I told him there was no room for negotiation. I told him if he had anything more to do with her than I would leave him and I would take our children with me. He said he needed some time to think about this to think. We have I haven’t really discussed it since then, but I’m getting ready to bring it up once and for all. I’m going to give him an ultimatum and a deadline. When I discussed this with someone of my friends, she said that forcing him to end the affair will probably have very negative consequences. Is she right? Is forcing his hand the wrong call?”

It is impossible for me to answer this question for this woman. I don’t know the man or the dynamics of their marriage. But I can tell you that there can be some consequences if you force your partner to end the affair. I will discuss some of them below.

He can hit it: I find this grossly unfair, but it is often reality. Even if your spouse understands why you need to issue the ultimatum, he will often resent you for not giving him a choice in the matter. They may also feel the other person’s loss and, rightly or wrongly, blame you for it.

He may long for the other person because he had no closure: This is another common consequence. Because he didn’t see the relationship through, he could always think that she was the one who got away. He may obsess over what could have been or what she is doing now.

He can still see her behind your back: Because of the things I mentioned above, some couples feel like they can’t let go of the other person. However, they often still want to hold on to their family. So in her own mind, one way to make everyone happy while she figures this all out is to watch her behind your back. Well, sometimes they don’t have physical contact or sex at this time, but they keep contact because they just can’t bear to let go completely.

He may see you as the person standing in the way of his happiness: There are times when the fake spouse projects his frustrations onto the faithful spouse. This isn’t fair or accurate, but sometimes he needs to put his anger somewhere and he won’t always blame the other woman or himself. He may portray you as the person who doesn’t understand him or who tries to keep him from true happiness.

You may also wonder if he ended the affair himself. Insecurity can result in: If you know that the only reason he is no longer with this other woman is because you forced him to do so, you can always wonder if he actually wants to be with you or if he is only forced to be with you. you is This can lead to all kinds of doubt and insecurity that cause the pain to continue.

The positive things that can come from forcing the affair to end: So far I have only mentioned the negative things that can happen if you make your partner have an affair. Well, I’ll admit that sometimes something good comes out of it. Sometimes he listens to your demands and breaks it down. So at least at that point the affair is over and they don’t see each other anymore. And in some cases, in time, the man realizes that ending the affair was the right thing to do. There have been couples who have saved their marriage and been healed in this situation. However, there are also couples who crumble under the weight of the consequences.

What I believe to be the better option is: As you can probably tell, I believe there is often too much risk with this strategy. Of course, I cannot and will not tell anyone what to do with their own marriage. But I believe it is more effective to point out the consequences that he did not make the right choice and then let him choose for himself. The script could be something like: “this should be your choice, but I can tell you for a fact that I cannot participate in a marriage involving someone else. In order for our relationship to continue and resolve itself, I needed to know that she is completely out of the picture and that you are completely sincere about saving our marriage. Until you can tell me this truthfully, then I cannot participate in our marriage. So let me know when’ You have come to a decision.”

You haven’t given him ultimatums per se, but you’ve let him know that he won’t enjoy the benefits of being married to you while he’s moving on with someone else. So now it is up to him to decide which life he wants more than the other. And as painful as it may be waiting for him to make this decision, at least you’ll know it’s a real decision. So if he ends the affair and returns to your marriage, you’ll know it’s because he really wanted to.

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