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How to Stay Skinny As a French Woman in 10 Easy Steps
If you’ve been to Paris, I’m sure you’ve noticed that there are far fewer people walking around with extra weight around their middles or their thighs or anywhere else. How, oh how, do those French women stay so slim?
Here are some of their tactics you might want to adopt:
- Start with small bones. French are small people by nature, their frames are narrow and not designed for carrying a lot of weight.
- Smoke cigarettes. Ugh, I’m not serious, but it’s a fact that the French in general smoke quite a bit, and it doesn’t have nearly the social stigma that it does in other parts of the world. Nicotine is a strong appetite suppressant.
- Walk. I’m not talking about putting on your sweats and tennis shoes and heading to the park. I’m talking about your next trip to the grocery store. And guess who’s carrying the groceries home? My French neighbor walks everywhere, including daily trips to the children’s school and the grocery store. In fact, she does so in high heels!
- Notice your food. What is that on your plate that you are eating? Take a bite and chew slowly. Comment on the flavors.
- Eat slowly. Take hours to finish your meal.
- Eat with your friends or if you don’t have any, at least with your family. Invite the waiter to sit for a while. To speak. To speak. To speak.
- Refuse your food. I have witnessed so many scenes in French restaurants where food and drinks have been returned to the kitchen, judged unsuitable for tender palates. Generally, the waiters don’t seem to mind this one bit. In fact, everyone seems to be enjoying themselves greatly; a little piece of theater about a burnt corner potato.
- Eat full fat cheese. Seriously. Stop eating low-calorie something. Until a few years ago, it would be difficult to even find a diet cola in France.
- Drink a glass of wine with the meal, but drink it so slowly that an hour later your glass is still half full.
- If you gain an ounce, even if it’s just between your ears, complain miserably about it. Talk for hours about how you just can’t fit into your dress anymore. Note that French women are not so different from other women in that respect.
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